1. Never come within 10 feet of the wok. 2. Never wash one of the wife's sweaters without a signed affidavit. 3. Never eat the last of the French chocolate unless held at gunpoint. 4. The husband is responsible for the whereabouts of the wife's glasses anytime they are not on her head. 5. The husband is required to convincingly simulate fashion sense when the wife is picking out clothes. 6. The husband is required to convincingly simulate menu planing skills when the wife is grocery shopping. 7. The spouse with the good knees fetches the cans of diet caffeine-free Mountain Dew from the kitchen for the spouse with the bad knees. Especially if she pouts cutely. 8. Big plastic dinosaurs and fuzzy stuffed animals can co-exist on the same bookcase, albeit on different shelves. 9. A man with five bookcases of antique books has no moral high-ground over a woman with a alarmingly rapid growing collection of DVDs. 10. A smile from a car window and a quick smooch is the perfect way to end a really crappy day at work.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
timeasmymeasure
Re: A Well-Trained Spouse
Date: 2004-03-24 09:47 pm (UTC)1. Never come within 10 feet of the wok.
2. Never wash one of the wife's sweaters without a signed affidavit.
3. Never eat the last of the French chocolate unless held at gunpoint.
4. The husband is responsible for the whereabouts of the wife's glasses anytime they are not on her head.
5. The husband is required to convincingly simulate fashion sense when the wife is picking out clothes.
6. The husband is required to convincingly simulate menu planing skills when the wife is grocery shopping.
7. The spouse with the good knees fetches the cans of diet caffeine-free Mountain Dew from the kitchen for the spouse with the bad knees. Especially if she pouts cutely.
8. Big plastic dinosaurs and fuzzy stuffed animals can co-exist on the same bookcase, albeit on different shelves.
9. A man with five bookcases of antique books has no moral high-ground over a woman with a alarmingly rapid growing collection of DVDs.
10. A smile from a car window and a quick smooch is the perfect way to end a really crappy day at work.
Things wives learn:
1. Antique books are not coasters.